Always Expect…Not Much…


This morning, I woke up and thought that it was time to stop dreaming.

I couldn’t remember my dream. All I could remember was the cold creeping through my system, making me cough and setting off depth-charges in my frontal-cortex. I made my still sleeping missus a cup of tea and returned to the computer to do something about life.

Send a bloody manuscript off, my bloody self was telling my bleeding self.

I scoured and scoured and scoured and then thought that one of my manuscripts (love the serious, all-important sound of that) should travel to a potential publisher. It was going to be The Piper or one of The Flood novels. In the end, it was Read After Burnout, Adventures In Everyday Madness.

Guess what? I ask that as if you really want to give a guess. 


Anyway, said publisher got back to me rather sharply and said that they liked the quality of my writing and that my manuscript was impressive. 

I thought of pride and falls.

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This is the story of what happened to me when anxiety took a grip. I lost my senses, I lost my job, and I lost me. I then turned to writing to find those things that had gone missing. How can you teach when you believe that education is a business that is failing in its primary remit of helping to create a better society? Indeed, how can you teach when you believe that you have nothing of value to pass on? The book/blog is the story of my recovery from the absolute darkness of the early days. It is an Odyssey through my life over the last twelve months and a retracing of my steps to discover how I found myself there. More than all of that, it is a re-evaluation and a rejoicing of all that which I call life. Happy reading and I hope it helps. There is madness, Everyday Madness, and not all of it comes from within.

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