Wear Protection

The great placebo of life is that magical cure for all ills. Get a job. Get Married. Get a mortgage. Get a pension. Get children. Get a dog. Get a cat. Get holidays. Get stressed. Get Life assurance. Get promotion. Get sleepless nights. Get a doctor’s appointment. Get time off work. Get medicine. Get better. But we don’t get better. We just continue in the same vein, more accustomed to the pain.

Tell the people and the ideologues that are polluting your life to get stuffed.

The great placebo of life is a myth that we all buy into in order to assure ourselves that it all makes sense. One day. One sunny day, it will all have been worth it. No more work. No more mortgage. No more pollutants. 

And then… no more you.

So, I looked at my cycle helmet this morning and felt the need to wear it for my trip into work. I stared at it for a long time. Back home, I almost always wear it; the missus makes sure of that. She reminds me of the fact that I am a husband and a dad and that if anything should happen…well. I have tried telling her about the great placebo of life, but she will not listen. 

“Would you throw yourself out of a plane?”

“It’s not the same.”

“Yes it is. Either way you would be dead!”

There is a logic to that which will not be denied by plain reason. Anyway, the helmet stayed on the ironing board and I pressed on with my journey to work.

In Mallorca, there are bikes everywhere: tourist bikes, mountain bikes, electric bikes and the type of bike that I ride, a road bike. Now, all the bikes that are not road bikes can be ridden without the affectation of a cycle helmet. Even on cycle paths, where there are no cars, it is expected that a cask is worn. Otherwise some serious berating will ensue. When my friend goes out cycling with me, we are both caskless; and aren’t we made aware of it. 

The other day, I was attacked by a woman with a bottle for cycling on a designated cycle path after just being told that I needed to wear a helmet by a German guy who was dropping his wife some distance behind in a bid to prove his manhood.

A few days later, a group of tourists, no doubt having benefited from a few after lunch drinks, almost fell off their bikes whilst uncontrollably heading in my direction. They had no helmets either, but that was okay.

The great placebo only matters for some and not for others.     

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