A is for Apocalypse…

This was the last food that I remember from Sandham:

Potato waffles Scrambled eggs and beans Yoghurts
Fruit juice  

Red lentil, chickpea and chilli (v) 

Roast lamb, roast potatoes, carrots, peas and mint sauce Sweet potato curry (v) Apple shortcakes 

Southern fried chicken, wedges and corn on the cob 

Orange Pavlova 

Toast and drinks.

It’s strange, but I can’t remember the exact date. Dates are not normally a problem, they register in my brain like items of shopping that are passed over scanners at the checkouts of most major supermarkets. Dates are now most definitely a problem as they don’t seem to occur, or even exist. So I spend my time remembering the food that I had been eating, recalling the taste of my favourite dishes whilst also conjuring up the taste of those that I didn’t like. I was wondering if outsiders, you, those that are reading this from a distance, have any idea about the V. It means vegetarian. I think that I had become vegetarian before all of this began to happen. My sister says it’s like a restaurant menu, the type that you could pay a lot of money for if you were going out at the weekend. I’m thinking of some of the younger boys and how they set about the business of eating. Like everybody else, they collect their food, knives and forks before sitting down with the apparent intention of eating. After that, there is some rearranging of the separate components of the meal, each according to magnetic pull. Green vegetables always went north whilst meat or fish were pulled towards the southern pole of the plate. Other food items were move around on a daily basis, but they never got the chance to inhabit either of the poles.

Fun definition:  a vegetarian is somebody who does not eat meat or fish.

Some people like to call themselves vegetarians, but they are not. They eat fish and fish is a type of meat, just underwater. A whale is a mammal just like us, but it swims in the see and does not live on land. The Japanese like to eat some whales because they say that it is part of their culture. I eat cod and haddock and tuna and the occasional sardine. I would like to call myself a vegetarian but the actual name for what I am is ‘pescatarian’ which is from the Italian for fish (pesce) and is a play upon vegetarian. I think that it sounds pretty good because it confuses a lot of meat-eaters who think that I must belong to some strange religious cult. A cult is a small group of people who follow religious practices that are seen by others, who are not in the group, to be strange and excessive, like Quakers or those who spend their lives working with children who are quite different  from what is expected of ‘normal’ children. There is a big book in the library which nobody ever reads, it’s called The Bible and it has stories in it that are about how various people learnt about the world. One of the most famous was Jesus who was crucified at around the age of thirty-two. He had a strange connection to holidays (the time when you don’t have to be at work or at school), Easter and Christmas but not August Bank Holiday, and led fishes. He was a ‘fisher of men’ but didn’t eat them. His followers ate some bread that they said was his body and some wine which they said was his blood. Quakers never did that but they were the ones who were accused of being a cult. Perhaps Sandham is the home of the cult because people tend to look at us when we are out in the community. And the point, avoid us, or say things that are meant to hurt us. We have been told to ignore them because they don’t know what they are saying. Jesus told his followers to ignore people who would hurt them and even suggested that they turn the other cheek. I’m not quite sure about that. 

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