Theft and the Tragic Cycle

  The thing about coincidences is that they do tend to happen, if only by coincidence. Take my daughter's bike for example; as somebody did the other day. In the great pantheon of stealing, bike theft comes in at a very low ranking. If Aristotle was to pronounce upon it, he would state that bikes... Continue Reading →

Going nowhere on a tragic cycle…

The problem with tragedy is that it never has a happy ending. Tragedy ends in death. It starts with a bad decision, leads on to disgrace and downfall, scrapes you through a period of suffering that appears never likely to end before there is a realisation, ‘Fuck, that’s what I did wrong’ or, ‘Fuck, I... Continue Reading →

Just Another Fryday

  Out of the frying pan and into the weekend.  I have always thought that the working week has been organised by somebody who doesn't read the label; Fragile, This way up! So, after a reasonably long working week, we get two days off to celebrate, relax, commiserate and fret. Weekends are the product of... Continue Reading →

God on Sex…

God wishes men to make love to their wives regularly. It's a duty, a religious observance, so why block the bedroom door? For men of independence, it is every day. For labourers, it is twice a week. For donkey drivers, once a week. For camel drivers, it is once every thirty days. For sailors, it... Continue Reading →

The Moon and Masturbation

EXTRA, EXTRA, READ ALL ABOUT IT! Luna gives the adjective lunaticus. This appears in the Vulgate (405) of the Dalmatian Christian writer Saint Jerome (Eusebius Hieronymus, 348–420) as an epithet for “a moon-struck” person, whence “crazed, insane, lunatic.” It was used of epilepsy, from the notion that the seizures were precipitated by moonlight. The paroxysmal... Continue Reading →

Love of a Bargain

Perhaps I was born with the need to fall upon 'bargains' like a bird of prey upon its 'prey'. I was brought up in the 60s, post war, but not yet post poor. In truth, bargains did not exist back then. There were no reductions for 'sell-by-date' as there was no defined date at which... Continue Reading →

Blessed are the Piss-makers.

Subject A woke up in the middle of darkness and felt for the glass of water at the side of his bed. He found it just as his fingers decided to add some urgency to their search. The resulting action was a slow, slow-motion tipping of the glass and its contents off the bedside table... Continue Reading →

My Ancestors Must Have Liked A Drop

The drinking of fermented & distilled liquors — when indulged in, developed, & pursued — is something that leads to hell, leads to rebirth as a common animal, leads to the realm of the hungry shades. The slightest of all the results coming from drinking fermented & distilled liquors is that, when one becomes a... Continue Reading →

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